"Tell xyz that he needs to join the calls." On the other end, I do not join a call just because someone tells me to after I have already decided not to join the call. I also do not join a call because someone said my boss told me to. I go to my boss to confirm and basically have him tell me to which is only after he convinces me what I am getting out of the call.
"Have xyz help you with this." If they were going to help me, they would have already helped me. I help those who I think I can help and can be helped. If I don't help, there is a reason. And that reason is not going to be resolved by someone of the same level or below (I am the bottom rung so not sure if this holds between managers of the same level but I imagine it shouldn't)
This is even worse when person xyz is in their own team and not mine. What makes them think that I have any sway to tell his own subordinate to do something.
Still almost as bad is if we are in the same team.
These types of bosses or managers decreases a bit of respect from me. Too bad my respect seem to have little value. It is essentially their primary job as boss or manager. If you want me to manage other people, make me the manger.
Unfortunately, there is little that can be done about this because it is such a corporate norm. I file this personal problem right with project managers not knowing how to manage a project. [I mean seriously, every corporation I have worked for have terrible project managers (ie good PMs by far the minority and typically from my experience do not have the certificates like PMP, etc.). Like using spreadsheets and have someone else basically managing the project with no credit to the project success.] I guess while I am at it, I also file this next to technical certificates. The more someone has (or maybe publish), the more incompetent they are. It seems only those who cannot need to have certificates to pretend they can do it.
